Shadows all around

2013.
It’s half a year later since I last blogged here. It’s been donkey years for me.
2012 was a busy but fulfilling year. I got what I was really aiming for at the end. That’s good. But it’s just taking another step forward in life.
School has started and I’m still adapting to my new environment… I really like OG 5 and I don’t want us to separate, but this is life isn’t it? So I’m treasuring all the time I’m spending with my OG during Orientation. It’s been fun aside from me being sick for a whole week already (and still not well), and I want to do well.
The next two years will be another goal to play towards, right?

Personally, life hasn’t been good. On the surface I’ve achieved quite a number of things, and that’s good, but the basic – most basic – of all things is in pieces.
That isn’t healthy at all. It doesn’t justify the surface. It doesn’t help at all.
It’s all because of one person’s selfish act, one person’s refusal to repent, one person’s persistence in doing something she knows is wrong, one person’s blindness, one person’s evil, one person’s change of heart, one person. One person can really change the world. Change the world of those around them. For everyone is interconnected, and no man is an island. There is hardly any way in which what we do will not affect others. Be considerate, be caring, think twice about what you do.
Because of this person, I might be no more than broken glass. I might be no more than swirling mixtures. I might be no more than a fragmented piece of glass on the floor.
I don’t know what to do either. Yesterday marked the first day of CNY. I’m not looking forward to tomorrow morning because of her.
When someone close to you, someone who knows you so well and you know so well, someone who claims to love you and you have loved, someone who has lived with you nearly all your life, sends you a threat, how does that feel?
Is this love?
Not the intimate kind of love, but any love wouldn’t involve threats, this I’m pretty sure. A person who truly loves you wouldn’t want to hurt you in the first place, or make you feel bad. That’s when genuine concern is there.
This should just be a cover. There isn’t that love anymore, there isn’t that true thing anymore.
I doubt this word now.
This whole thing has just been an ugly story of lies. Lies after lies after lies. A cover which looks pure, but covers the darkest corners of the heart.
One day, the truth will be exposed.
You’re just making yourself look silly and crazy by doing weird stuff.
You’re not hurting us. You’re just beginning to dig your own grave.
But you must lie on the bed you make. When the time comes, forgiveness will be the most difficult thing.
What good comes out of all this?

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